Fear is Stronger than Love?

Recently, my wife Wendy read a Cambodian traditional story that ended with the conclusion, “Fear is stronger than love.” My first thought on hearing about it was: how sad! But then I recognized that in practical terms it is very true. In general we are more easily and forcefully motivated by fear than by love.

In Cambodia it can be seen in the way many people won’t speak out against injustice because they are afraid. People are more likely to vote for a leader they are afraid of than one who cares for them. In their experience, those who are feared can inflict great pain and suffering, whereas there is little experience of those who love them taking away pain and suffering.

Perhaps another way of putting it is they have not experienced a love that is stronger than fear. 1 John 4:18 states that perfect love drives out fear. But what if our experience of love is far from perfect? It’s always easy to point the finger but in my own experience there is also a degree in which people are more motivated by fear than by love.

Our elections back home often consist of one side warning of what will happen if you vote for the other side. Even the ‘good news of Jesus’ can be presented in ways that use fear as the motivating force more than love. Many times in my life I see the ways in which I have chosen to act or not because I was afraid. Even recently, issues I have faced in the leadership role have provoked the old familiar feelings of low self-confidence with the associated temptations to defensiveness and inaction. When in difficult situations I get afraid. Fear can become the motivating force.

But perfect love does drive out fear and I have experienced perfect love – once again I am reminded of my need to dwell in Him.